BUILDING THE BEST YOU

As you know I do a lot of reading.  I came across some really good advise:

Build the things that make a life worth living your priority.  Notice the negative things you say to yourself.  Try an exercise:  pretend the negatives were said by someone "whose mission in life was to make [you] miserable,"  and then fight back.  That way, says Martin Seligman, "you don't blindly accept you own insults."

Nurture your strengths, not your negativity.

Nurture human virtues:  Satisfaction, Contentment, Fulfillment, Pride, Serenity.

Ask youself "What's right?" and live your life around those strengths.

So this evening I took an assessment.  Where am I in the scale of negative vs. positive.

I got up this morning; straightened the bathroom and started a load of laundry while getting ready for work.  I got to work and began my day and stayed organized completing the various goals that I had set for the day.  When I returned home I met my daughters in the backyard to see how their day went and then spent time harvesting produce from the garden. 

I felt like that I accomplished a great deal and that I have stayed organized while there was intermittent interuptions that pulled me from various tasks.  Only for a moment was I frustrated at work.  Personal issues at home made me sad for a little while.  Overall the day was good.

I am grateful that I have a job.  I am grateful I have a home.  I am grateful for my Dad, who is always there when I need to talk.

Today I was challenged by the mistakes of a co-worker.  The mistakes generated more work that required my immediate attention pulling me from my scheduled tasks.  I was able to overcome this challenge by coming up with a solution and found an opportunity to train and instruct preventing future errors.

I found a moment to spend some time savoring a nice warm cup of carmel chocolate latte (hot chocolate frothed up with carmel) while I wrapped up my work for the day.

INTEGRITY POINTS

This week I did a couple things to improve upon some areas in my life.

• During the week I had asked my children to do a few things around the house.  Aislyn has been helpful and pleasant about her assistance.  I was thinking about how she has been doing well in school.  I remembered that I hadn't really said anything to her or rewarded her.  So, when I got home Thursday evening from work I had Aislyn get dressed and we went to the movies just the two of us and watched "Voyage of the Dawn Treader."  I explained to her why I was treating her to a movie.
• While at work I pulled my calendar out and marked the days of birthdays and anniversaries for the month of January so that I can remember to send cards.  Now I need to take the time to make the cards.
• Victor took the boys to the Tri-Stake Youth New Year's Eve Dance Friday evening.  Aislyn, Allisa and I went to my bedroom; ate See's chocolates and watched a couple movies until midnight.  We had fun.  It was good to spend time with them.

I guess I just need to slow down a bit; be mindful of my family and let them know that I am thinking of them.  I plan to spend more quality time with my children.  This will take practice.

How did you do this week?

INTEGRITY ASSIGNMENT

When I sat and thought about the past couple years to assess whether my integrity was flawed; I thought of my family and the relationships I have with my children and my husband.  I thought of my relationships with my siblings and felt that I could do a little better.

I thought about the times that I have been forgetful or neglectful.  I know sometimes I have thought that it won't matter if I forget to make a phone call on a birthday or if I choose not to send a note of thanks.  I have accumulated a list of things that I should have done and didn't. 

I can't go back and catch up on the neglect; I can start now by remembering my family on special occassions.  I can start now to recognize success in my children and giving them kudos.  I can start now to be grateful for the things that my husband has done.  I can start now to be less casual about my relationships with my family and show that they are of great value to me.  I can start now to put a plan in place to do the simple things like remembering birthdays and anniversaries.

WEEK 1 - INTEGRITY

Integrity is the foundation of a successful life.  When our behaviors, actions, and choices are consistent with our deepest values, we gain the courage to be ourselves, and the confidence to ask for what we need.  To the extent that we haven't cleaned up the unfinished business from our past, we will unconsciously punish ourselves by withholding the love, success, and abundance we desire.

Resolving our integrity issues makes us feel worthy enough to manifest our dreams.

This Week's Assignment:

This week, take some time to look back over the past two years of your life.  Make a list of the relationships or situations where you haven't acted with complete integrity.  On a piece of paper, write the person's name, with a brief description of what you did or didn't do that left you feeling bad about yourself.

Next, close your eyes; take a couple of slow, deep breaths; and ask yourself, "What could I do to bring this situation back into balance and restore my own sense of integrity?"  Could you write a letter, deliver an apology, or contribute in some way to someone in need?  This action could involve the person directly, but it doesn't have to.

Design a plan of action to restore your integrity.

Give yourself 100 points for every integrity issue you resolve this week.

INTRODUCTION

Debbie Ford put together a Do-It-Yourself Kit.  I started this kit at the beginning of the year and then quit about two months in.  I am beginning again and I wanted you to join me in this journey.  I will share with you the detailed information found on each weekly card.  If you wish to join in the activity, I would get a journal to keep track of your progress.

Debbie's Introduction:

"Welcome to the best year of your life!  How do I know that this will be your best year yet, you ask?  Well, it's because the program you now hold in your hands is a recipe for falling deeply and authentically in love - with your life.  Regardless of the specific date you begin this program - whether it's January 1, your birthday, or any other day of the year - this course will inspire you to achieve new levels of joy, success, and vitality in every area of your life.  If you do the exercieses outlines on the enclosed visualization CD and weekly cards, I promise that you'll unleashe uncharted levels of self-live, worthiness, pride, and self-esteem."

"You may wonder what loving yourself has to do with creating your best life.  Well, in a word, everything!  Having coached and trained hundreds of thousands of people worldwide, I can tell you that loving yourself is the most essential prerequisite to living your best life.  When you feel great about who you are, you radiate an undeniable magnetic energy that attracts all the things you desire to you."

"People you've been meaning to call "magically" show up in your life.  Ideas and purposeful actions for your projects come easily.  Your relationships with others-even those with whom you've had problems in the past - become lighter and more fun.  When you're kind, generous, and respectful toward yourself, you fell worthy and deserving of claiming the gifts of this world."

"That's what I mean by self-love.  I don't just mean loving yourself on the days when you wake up looking and feeling fantastic.  It's easy to feel great when everything is going your way -- that is, your bank account is full, people around you are treating you well, your career is soaring, your kids are happy, and the house is clean.  The kind of self-love I'm referring to is generated from within and remains steady, regardless of your outer circumstances.  Genuine self-love means loving yourself even in the presence of your flaws.  Can you imagine having the ability to love and accept yourself even when you're feeling unworthy, unimportant, or scared?  Or lvoing yourself soo much that you treat yourself with compassion even when you're feeling angry or jealous?"

"When we withhold love from outselves - if we feel shame, judgment, doubt, conflict, or embarrassment about who we are - success and contentment elude us as we chase the love and acknowledgment in the outer world that we haven't given to ourselves.  Our outer world is a mirror of our inner world:  This means that the better we feel about ourselves on the inside, the better people will treat us on the outside.  If we want to create more joy, passion, and success in our lives, we must first cultivate these qualities within ourselves."

"Think aobut it this way: If, 12 months from now, you knew at the deepest level just how worthy and deserving you were, if you had compassion and acceptance for your imperfections, if you took actions every day that moved you a little closer to your goals and desires and felt the pride of your own accomplishments... if 12 months from now you were the person you've always wanted to be, wouldn't you consider this to be the best year yet?  I thought so!

So get ready to embark on the most important and rewarding journey you've ever taken - the journey to the best year of your life!